This is a conversation that Chels and I had today:

((On the T in Boston. The train is crowded with the evening's travelers, and seating is squished at best. The train stops, doors open, and swarms of people get off and disperse, leaving many vacant seats))

Me: Chels, go sit with Nan.
Chels: I don't want to. I like sitting over here with you.
Me: But I'm being smothered between you and this lovely plexiglass pediment, please go over there.
Chels: Why don't you move?
Me: ... I'm too tired. I think I'll just be a lump.
Chels: A lump, huh?
me: Yes, I am a lump, and I shall forever be a lump. I have already resigned myself to lump-hood.
Chels: Oh.
((few minutes later))
me: I've been thinking...
Chels: Uh oh...
Me: According to the basic laws of Physics
Chels: Uh oh
Me: If I were to jump into the air while the train was speeding along, I would end up farther down toward the end of the train, because I was staying in the same place while the train was moving.
Chels: Uh huh
Me: So if I had enough thrust to propel myself forward as well as up, I could land across the way, by Nan. Where its roomier.
Chels: Try it.
Me: Nah. I'm a lump remember. Lumps don't deal well with sudden movements. Lunging, propelling forward, jumping...yeah... they just don't agree with the basic Lump Composition.
Chels: So you're just gonna stay here.
Me: Leave me alone, you Pelican.


Oh, and this is amusing:






ash @ 10:25 PM