here I go again selling myself with another man's words with a voice a face a gesture that's not mine because this is who I want to be. to be how many nights have I stayed awake trying to remember all the things I'm not and praying, just this once that I can do it better than the ones before. here I go again smiling at the girls I hate or to be and trying not to show myself (what if I can't be perfect?) how many times can I be good enough someday I could wake up and forget that I'm not all the other girls I always seem not to be . to be?

here I go again, crying when they tell me to clutching my side and fishing for a heart to do this one more time.

ash @ 8:31 PM